Issue #91 – Rock and Roll Lifestyle

The Descendants Vol 8: The Weaver's Web

• Issue #85 – The Ballad of Bad Lass
• Issue #86 – Those Not Forgotten
• Issue #87 – Descendants… In Space
• Issue #88 – Tome of Battle
• Issue #89 – All That Glitters
• Issue #90 – Just Us Sidekicks
• Issue #91 – Rock and Roll Lifestyle
• Descendants Special #8 – The Heart of Rock ‘N Roll
• Issue #92 – Homage
• Issue #93 – Day of Recovery
• Issue #94 – The Knight, The Witch and the Gadgeteer (FaerieQuest Part 1)
• Issue #95 – Into The Woods (FaerieQuest Part 2)

Rock and Roll Lifestyle (Part 6)

Lisa and Jessica strummed out the last notes of Burning Down the Garden as Juniper and Sonia stood front and center, heads bowed as the lights on stage faded to a single spotlight over them and then faded to darkness.

Snackrifice Featuring Sonia Remington was practicing on the actual stage they would be using for the festival at Superior Roy’s Pizza Presents The Locksley Music Hall. Their guests were occupying the first few rows front and center of the otherwise empty seats as they practiced their sets and stage show. When the last song finished, they dutifully and enthusiastically applauded.

“You guys are great. Thank you so much.” Juniper’s voice came from the speakers. “You didn’t need to stay here while were ran through all this over and over.”

“You know we’d nip out when you’re in need of moral support!” shouted Malcolm.

Cyn jumped to her feet. “Besides, the music’s awesome! I’m pirating the show to play at home as we speak!”

Meanwhile, behind the others, Tink had been monitoring the program she’d designed for the group’s special effects—as well as a few others that had nothing to do with the show. Warrick was sitting with her to keep her company.

“Still nothing on our hitman’s hacker,” she whispered to him.

“Are we sure he wasn’t working alone?”

She shook her head. “Doubtful. There were queries sent to Sonia’s palmtop while he was presumably taking aim at Cyn-as-Sonia. I managed to reset Sonia’s system so the cloned version won’t be able to sync anymore, but the hacker? They’re gone.”

“How dangerous do you think they are alone?”

This time, she shrugged. “I’m going to tell you the truth here: If we’re talking about programming machines to perform operations or making user interfaces, I’m good. Otherwise I’m really just a script kiddie using things Ms. Brant designed. They might have just kicked my ass at this because I’m not that good.

Warrick reached out and put his arm around her, giving her a little massage. “You’re brilliant at what you do and you’ve done great. No one expects you to be an expert at everything just because you’re a genius at other things, alright? If we have to, we’ve got Descendants: LA’s guy on it too, right?”

“He’s already told me he’s more or less their equivalent of me.” She leaned into him, but didn’t look any happier. “I think we need to send this to Ms. Brant.”

“If that what you think we oughta do,” he said, “Just remember, I wouldn’t have gotten even this far.”

He would have said more, but Tink pulled away from her craning her neck to look up to the very rear of the auditorium. There was a scuffle going on between the building’s security staff and someone who was starting to shout. “What’s going on up there?”

Warrick looked too and scowled. “Shit, do you think it’s another assassin? We never figured out who the hell paid that guy.”

“Let go of me you bastards!” One of the many voices at the rear finally became audible. “Look, this is… is official… emergency—it’s official emergency business! We need to see Sonia. Sonia! Hey, Sonia!”

“Or and idiot stalker fan.” Tink turned away.

“Sonia! It’s me, Joe! Joe Adams—Baldy!”

That made Tink look in that direction again. “Isn’t that the name of…”

“That guy from Sonia’s touring band,” Warrick finished for her, “’A pissed off former business partner’. That’d about do it.” He started focusing in that direction, trying to sense any firearms on Joe.

A scrum of three security guards shifted as Baldy Adams forced his way through their attempts to stop him. They still had hold of his arms and shoulders, but his bullheaded determination and prior experience at being restrained by law enforcement allowed him to partially drag them into the aisle between the seats. “Sonia! Hey Sonia!”

On stage, Sonia looked at the band, clearly embarrassed. The mic caught her very quiet, “Um… sorry. Take five guys?”

Heartened by the sound of her voice, Baldy struggled mightily and managed to stumbled free and clear of the guards. He managed to pause and shoot the trio an indignant look before realizing they were still pursuing him and bolted down the aisle.

No one saw the gold-tinged metal tentacle that forced itself under the aisle’s carpeting, then rose up just enough to trip the already off-balanced and disheveled man as he ran, sending him in a headlong tumble that ended at the orchestra pit. The guards were on him immediately.

Two more people, a pale woman and a dark-skinned man, peered sheepishly through the doors Baldy had burst through.

With amazing prowess, Baldy crawled his way partially free again. “Sonia.” Now he was wheezing with effort. “You gotta get outta here. You’re totally in danger!”

Sonia had been trying to gracefully maneuver her way to the rear of the stage to make an exit (stage right or left didn’t matter), now she stepped forward. “I’m what now?” Noticing the security guards moving to pounce again, she motioned for them to wait. “Joe, what’s going on?”

Standing shakily, Joe made a show of dusting himself off. “I… well look, I go crazy pissed when you picked these kids to play with you here… then I got crazy pissed. Uh, drunk that is. Real drunk. And I… well you gotta promise you won’t get mad—or press charges.”

That made Sonia raise an eyebrow and gesture for the guards to move closer just in case.

“Just get to the damn point, you idiot! This is important!” Bobby scramble shouted from the door.

“Yeah, what did you do?” added Sonia.

Joe folded his hands in front of him, somehow channeling a little boy who just broke the neighbor’s window playing baseball. “I—and I wanna make it clear how drunk I was—I might have put out a hit on you. I totally didn’t mean it and I was pretty much just bitching to an old—“

He didn’t manage to say anything more because the security guards had tackled him. And this time they weren’t going easy on him.

***

“This is by far the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” Teen Machine had volunteered to be the on call nearby in case there was more than one assassin after Sonia. He ‘just happened’ to be in the neighborhood when the ruckus started and ha assured the security staff that he would be taking Baldy into custody himself after he finished taking statements.

No one even wondered why a superhero was taking statements, not even Sonia.

Now Sonia and her old touring band were crammed in the green room with him. Almost everyone looked embarrassed just to be involved with Joe’s drunken stupidity.

He stroked where his chin would be if he weren’t wearing a helmet and paced the length of the room. “Well the good news is, the dude this guy hired? Totes going to jail. The bad news? We think the hacker he was working with got away and took the money with him, meaning you guys,” at this he pointed to Joe’s band-mates, “are out a lot of money that it’s super-unlikely he can pay back. You’ve got an amazing larceny and embezzlement case against him though. You know, after the life sentence for hiring a hitman.”

“No.”

The room seem to freeze in time as all eyes went to the person speaking: Sonia.

“Say what now?” Bobby Scramble’s eyebrows almost merged into his hairline.

“Yeah, I’m gonna agree with him,” said Teen Machine, “How can you not press charges on a guy that almost got you killed?”

Sonia sighed and sank back against the counter she was leaning on. “Because none of this would have happened if I weren’t starting to turn into a flighty ditz with my success. This was kind of a warning sign that I need to start thinking more before I act or I’m going to end up as some leather-skinned gargoyle with a sex tape and a coke addiction.”

Teen Machine looked around the room, then voiced the unspoken reaction. “Still not following here.”

“It’s just that… I hire Lisa and Kay to write songs for me without thinking about the fact that they had their own band they needed to promote. But then when I ‘got around’ to thanking them, I more or less took an opportunity away from the band that helped me make a number one single. I wasn’t thinking about how I was effecting other people, just that I was advancing my career.”

Debby raised her hand. “That’s literally how this business works. We didn’t take it personal, Joe’s just stupid when he’s… No. he’s just stupid.”

“Maybe it shouldn’t be this way though,” said Sonia, impassioned, “or at the very least, maybe I shouldn’t just go along with it. This whole think seems like a sign that I should try and do better—at least personally—instead of just going with it. So first thing’s first: Bobby, Debby; I’m going to pay you back the money Joe stole from you.”

The pair looked taken aback, but there was no way they were going to turn that money down—they needed to eat after all.

“And if you can find a replacement for Joe, I’d love to have you guys back as my band—full time after the Festival.”

“Holy shit, are you for real?” Debby asked before she could think better of it. Sonia nodded.

Joe however, wanted to push his luck. “Wait. Find a replacement? What about me?”

Sonia stared at him. He still seemed indignant, so she clarified, “You still tried to kill me. You’re lucky I’m not pressing charges.”

“Also, I’m still totally pressing charges for sealing out money, man,” added Bobby Scramble.

Teen Machine raised his hand, “And I’m pretty sure you admitting to hiring the hitman is probably cause to search your computer dude. The cops are going to find everything—and they really don’t need Sonia to press charges to put you away basically forever.”

“But…”

“Seriously?” Teen Machine moved to tower over the beleaguered rocker. “No one cares how drunk you were or how sorry you are now. She could’ve been killed! Other people around her could’ve been killed! Actually, now that I think about it, the fact that you can just get drunk and somehow call in an assassin makes you more dangerous, not less!”

He clamped a hand over his shoulder. “You’re coming with me, dude.”

***

It was 3am in the morning and the party Snackrifice had thrown for all their friends in their suite was just winding down. Sonia had been invited, but understandably declined. Even with the bumpy and abrupt end to their practice though, the band was still in full celebration mode—even if half their guests had no idea that they were celebrating more than just their big break.

Holding a flute of champagne, Lisa stepped out onto the balcony. The night was warm, just verging on too warm, and the air wasn’t exactly fresh, but the balcony was quieter and gave her space to think.

She was in the earliest hours of the eve of the biggest night of her life. Complaining about the cyborg assassin seemed petty considering the fact that she met Sonia thanks to Inexorable’s attack on Mayfield and Sonia’s involvement with the Mayfield Irregulars.

And if the performance at the festival was going to be life-changing, it would only really be one in a long line of major changes she’d been through in a few short years. It wasn’t just things like starting college either: she’s been possessed by evil, lost her aunt to the same, became a superhero, became aware of worlds beyond the understanding of other humans, saved that same aunt, and even started on the path to being a mentor to a group of other magi.

If it wasn’t for all that, she wouldn’t be where she was right now, about to have her dream come true.

A smile crept over her face. No matter what she went through, how much danger she’d found herself in, and how much stress her secrets sometimes put on her, it was worth it.

Behind her, the door opened, briefly allowing the strains of some song by Violence Museum to drift out before it closed again.

“So War filled me in on what went down today. A team-up with the Other Descendants and no one even got to see it.” JC came up to the railing next to her, two punch cups in hand.

Lisa laughed. “Try not to sound so disappointed. Besides, they asked for some help with something after the concert. Something magical even their magical people aren’t clear about.”

“Cool. Should I go out and get a ski mask, tag along?”

She threw back the last of her champagne and set the flute down on the railing. “If you ever wanted to hang around while I’m on patrol or with the Magi Club, I do have glamors I can cast on you. All we need to do is come up with an alter ego. How would you like to be huge and green with cute, purple pants?” She accepted the punch glass he offered.

“I’m… gonna pass on that one. But keep the idea open, I’ll draw something up.”

Lisa smiled at him, then looked up at the night sky. The city lights obscured all but the brightest stars. “I was just thinking about all that’s happened that got us to this point. Remember when we broke up every other week? Or last summer when you found out about all this, then you had to come save us?”

“Mmm-hmm,” replied JC. “Sorry about all the drama over the years. All that shit kinda doesn’t mean much these days, huh?” He put his arm around her and pulled her close. “And now, as Kay would say…” he affected a terrible British accent, “We’re gonna be rock stars. Even with all the superhero stuff, that still feels pretty big.”

Lisa turned in his embrace and put her free arm around him, holding up the punch glass. “To bigger things then?”

JC clinked his glass with hers. “Bigger. Brighter. Better.”

End Issue #91.